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We have a 4 month old puppy and she normally does great in the crate at night. We stopped crating for naps and she sleeps outside of the crate during the day. At night when we put her in for bed time she will be quiet for a few minutes and then start to bark and whine for a few minutes. We have let her out after a few minutes (if she hasn't pooped in a few hours just in case, or peed) but then she won't go and we put her right back in and then it repeats for a few minutes and then she's fine and sleeps through the night. Every time I hear her cry in the crate it gives me a pit in my stomach. *Note to add- this is the first puppy I've had in years and she is not destructive at all in the crate so I don't know why it gives me so much anxiety. Has anyone else gone through this and how were you able to overcome it? I also get anxiety anytime we leave her in the crate and leave the house. She is still too young and curious to leave at home by herself. The crate is the only thing that gives me anxiety and maybe it's because I'm scared she will regress and not do okay in there in the future? Any helpful tips or how you learned to deal with it would be super helpful!!

Ais

I am coming here posting while exhausted and extremely upset so forgive any lack of detail or clarification. My wife and I adopted a 2 month old mini Aussiedoodle and she is now 10 months old. For several reasons I have been the main puppy parent, meaning I'm doing about 90% of the work. My wife isn't bonded with her, although the puppy is absolutely obsessed with her, and she doesn't help me. I'm exhausted from constantly having to mind the puppy and barely have time for cleaning the house or doing my own hobbies.

Today my wife randomly suggested rehoming the puppy. I was in a remote meeting and the puppy was going absolutely bonkers in her crate. She had just been out to go potty, she was just demanding to be let out because she realized my wife was home. My wife ignored her until I asked via text to use one of our puppy-calming hacks so puppy could quiet down until I was done. I received a message back about thinking about rehoming. This started an argument that ended with my wife storming out of the house.

On one hand I do want to rehome her. I miss the freedom of puppy-free life and want to not be stressed out in my home. Her crate is in my craft room and I can't go in there unless either let her out and spend at least an hour with her, or she unleashes Demon Puppy and would shriek and whine endlessly. But on the other hand I love her so much and have spent all this time tending to her and training her and spending money on her things that it feels like such a waste to give her back. She WILL be a good dog but she's still a baby and is learning.

All I can remember is the first day we brought her home, she was so scared that she vomited all over my car and didn't leave her crate for 12 hours despite us trying to coax her out to use the bathroom. She would be so scared to go somewhere else with a stranger.

Will rehoming her traumatize her or set her up to fail with someone else?

I have an almost 6 month old pitbull/lab/boxer mix and he is soo active. We are crate training and for the last month or so he was doing so well. But today he seems to hate his crate again. Barking, biting, crying, the whole shabang. I have been hesitant to give him any sort of calming chew as I am not sure which ones are okay/safe and I don't want to have to rely on them – I realize he is still a puppy and just going through phases. So I am looking to see if anyone else has used any or any had any words of advice? Ill add: im still not sold on using them just looking at it in the future.

We brought home our 9-week-old Border Collie 4 days ago. He’s been such a good boy—very calm, timid, mellow, and loves touch and praise. He seems to have a bit of separation anxiety and wants to stay close to us. He’s also very smart; the breeder already taught him sit, stay, wait, etc., and we’ve continued training.

I’m struggling with nap/crate training. For the first few days he napped around the house, but we crated him at night and he did well—last night he fell asleep within minutes. During the day, though, he panics in the crate. We always feed him in it and keep toys inside, and he’ll go in on his own to eat or get toys, but not to sleep.

I took a week off work to help him settle, and today tried putting him in the crate for his first nap (starting with 20 minutes). He howled for about 10 minutes, slept a little, then started panting and moving, so I let him out after 20 minutes.

My questions are:
• Should I put him in the crate for every nap, some naps, or only nighttime sleep?
• Should the crate be covered or open so he can see me?
• Yesterday he had to be alone for 2.5 hours for the first time and our neighbor said he cried for about 1.5 hours. How do I prevent him from feeling abandoned?

Any insight or tips would be greatly appreciated!

Hey everyone, I need some advice.

Me and my boyfriend adopted a puppy around a month ago. It was my boyfriend's idea – it was his dream to own a dog. I'm more of a cat person but he convinced me to adopt a dog. I like all animals so that wasn't a big deal for me and I also wanted to make my boyfriend happy.

After a week since we had adopted the pup, my boyfriend told me that he is sad because the dog clearly likes me more. I told him to not get discouraged because he has tendencies to spiral into negative thoughts. He said that I don't see all of the dog's negative behaviours towards him because I'm not at home as much as he is. It's true, I spend a lot of time at work. My bf kinda blamed me for the fact that the puppy liked me more because I'm way softer than him if it comes to training and eliminating bad behaviours.

Since then, I'm really trying to be less soft and more consistent with the training stuff. I've noticed that the dog indeed likes me more – he follows me everywhere, he is way happier when I come home etc. Meanwhile, my boyfriend is frustrated and sad that his dream didn't come true and keeps complaining that the pup doesn't bring him any happiness and that dog doesn't like him at all (I don't think it's this radical).

I think it might be my fault for being too soft or maybe it's the fact that I'm a totally different person than my boyfriend. I'm quiet, I rarely get nervous or angry, my bf is the opposite.

I'm sad and nervous about the whole situation. I really wish the pup liked my boyfriend more – it was meant to make him happy, not miserable. How can I make the situation better?