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  • (F/21) Puppy Blues + Depression/regret

    Hi everyone,

    My boyfriend and I recently adopted a 4-month-old Border Terrier less than 72 hours ago. For some background, I’ve wanted my own dog for as long as I can remember. Ever since my boyfriend and I moved into our new apartment, I’ve been begging for us to get a dog.

    I suffer from chronic depression and anxiety, and since my boyfriend works long hours, I thought having a dog would give me companionship and comfort while he’s gone.

    But the puppy blues hit me harder than a truck. I’ve been terrified to leave her in her crate at night and feel like I have to watch her every second. I’ve had multiple emotional breakdowns — sobbing in my closet, feeling like I can’t breathe, and desperately wanting an escape.

    The hardest part is that she’s actually very well-behaved for a puppy. She’s sweet, calm, and already starting to get attached to both of us — especially my boyfriend, who’s completely fallen in love with her.

    But since I’m a full-time college senior, I’m the one caring for her most of the time. I've already started to fall behind on my school work as well. I texted the breeder to ask about returning her, and although I feel like I’ve already made up my mind to do it, I’m in a constant battle in my head — feeling like an absolutely horrible person for even thinking this way.

    I love her, and I can tell she’s starting to trust us, but I’m scared because I haven't been able to balance school, my mental health, and her needs at the same time. I have a schedule made for her, but I just can't seem to follow it.

    Has anyone else gone through this? How did you cope or make peace with your decision? I’m really struggling and could use as much advice and perspective as possible.

    submitted by /u/hailstorm447
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  • Advice for a first time owner who wants a Shepsky

    Hey, I am just looking for advice on how I can get ready for owning a Shepsky.

    I have 2 kids I have 50/50 with their mum, I work from home with 1-2 days in the office. I have a big long house with a long garden which would be perfect for a dog to run around. And I have a lot of good parks and long walks nearby.

    I want a Shepsky because they seem to be complimentary breeds they are family orientated from the German shepherd and playful from the husky. They also seem to negate some of the negatives from both breeds where they are less if an escape artist but also not as reactive.

    I'm aware that cross breeds aren't always predictable but from what I have read they seem to fit what I want. I am also aware of their high exercise needs and have watched lots of videos about training a working dog. I am wanting to have a dog that needs lots of exercise because I am into fitness and want to do more of it, perhaps running with the dog using one of those leads that go around your waist.

    I'm asking how will I know if I'm ready and I'm not willing to find out the hard way that I'm not a ruin a perfectly good dog. I read that both Huskies and German Shepherds are not good dogs for first time owners. But I'm 38 now, by the time I'm not a first time owner I'll be over 50 since I don't really think I have time for 2 dogs in the next few years.

    So in summary, I feel like I have read enough to know this is the right dog breed for me and the lifestyle I want. But how is there anything I should be doing to make sure I am ready to take this dog on as a first time owner?

    submitted by /u/Keithin8a
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  • Beach dog in El Salvador

    I have fallen in love with this dog who has been at my Airbnb for three days now he sleeps outside my house and he won’t leave us alone. I I am really thinking about bringing him back to Canada with me. Has anyone experienced doing this? If so, please give me feedback. I’ve looked into it and I think I could get this done. I have people here who could watch him after his shots since I am going home in seven days.

    submitted by /u/Lucky_Personality749
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  • Any realistic tips for keeping up with dog’s energy level with working parents, a toddler, and the govt shutdown? (Jumping, reactivity)

    We have a beautiful girl who will be 5 this year, she’s an Australian cattle dog/pitty mix. My husband adopted her before we met and I want to stress that we are not giving her up ever.

    She gets two walks a day on a good day, one on a bad day. She’s out in the yard all the time, mostly likes to sunbathe. We have soothing toys for her. But we cannot get her to relax while our baby, who is one year old, is out and about. We keep them separated, I do not believe in dogs getting facetime with babies unless the dog is magically calm and our girl is not calm. She sits at the baby gate constantly watching him and if he goes to the gate and touches her, she jumps away.

    If we have guests over, we cannot stop her from barreling into people and jumping. We reward all four paws on the ground, have guests ignore her completely if she jumps, we tried leashing her (it distresses her too much), and tried crating her when people come over. We cannot figure it out. We have had our trainer come over and observe her and when he ignored her, she did eventually calm down, but then when he sat down she was all over him again.

    He recommended we tire her out regularly and stay consistent with rewarding paws on the ground and having guests ignore her. But she’s 50 pounds of pure muscle.

    We don’t have guests often enough for it training to stick. Holidays are coming up and I’m so stressed.

    When our baby was 4 months old we tried to move in with his family. They have a dog who has been our dog’s best friend since they got her 2 years ago. Within 2 weeks we did see signs of both dogs getting annoyed with the other, suddenly our dog who never cared for toys would not share, and one day she barked/corrected their dog when she was jumping. But they went back to normal for a few days.

    One night I was on the couch with their dog, watching tv with my husband (who was on another couch with our dog). My husband went upstairs to get me a blanket and our dog attacked theirs 🙁 we were just sitting on the couch. It was awful. We kept them separate for 2 days, letting them out in the house on shifts. but then their dog managed to escape when our was out and it was horrifying.

    Obviously, we have moved out. It’s been almost 9 months. We have a great behavioral trainer and we have trained the dogs together in a controlled environment. Their dog has forgiven ours and wants to play, ours is mostly neutral but not interested.

    But now our dog has random reactivity towards dogs that don’t like her. It makes it so hard for us walk her because we have a baby, i can’t risk something happening with a baby on my chest. We do manage to divide and conquer, but this isn’t always possible.

    We usually have in home care for our baby and previously had a dog walker who would come a few times a week. But my husband is a federal employee so we are going to have to make some hard choices soon (he’s essential so still working just not getting paid), our sitter just found her dream job (yay for her!), and I can’t find a sitter who is comfortable with our dog. We also can’t find a dog walker who is comfortable with her. She’s great on a leash until a dog doesn’t like her and then she pulls and is aggressive.

    She’s getting less activity and I’ve noticed her barking aggressively at passerbys in the yard.

    All tips welcome. Our situation is hopefully temporary but holidays are coming up and I could really use some advice. Thank you!

    submitted by /u/Help_idkhow2date
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  • How to help dog adjust to a move

    Looking for some suggestions on how to help my dog adjust to a new move that seems to have increased his anxiety and has him on edge. For background, we have just moved about 2 weeks ago. We are in the same neighborhood so we’re not in a completely unfamiliar space but our previous apartment is the only place he’s ever lived before this. Typically he is very good with other dogs and unless it’s dark outside isn’t very fearful of people. Since we’ve moved, he seems to be much more on edge and fearful (barking, hair raised, lunging toward) when anything comes near our new place or near us – cars, people, dogs, etc. are there specific tips on how to help him adjust to this new space and people?

    submitted by /u/WillingnessAgile962
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  • Help get my dog used to my boyfriend

    My boyfriend and I live together and adopted a 7.8lb, 1.5 year old chihuahua about a month ago. She’s incredibly sweet, and I have definitely become her person. I am a woman, for what it’s worth. And I work from home, so I’m with her almost all the time. We also have another dog ,11yo, mutt, 48lbs, and my chihuahua LOVES her. Our older dog…tolerates her lol.

    She’s completely comfortable with me, and she’s pretty much fine with my boyfriend when he’s just chilling on the couch.

    She will approach him, ask for pets, and sit with him no problem. She doesn’t cuddle with him like she does me, though.

    The issue seems to be that she’s much more wary of him when he’s standing up. Keep in mind he’s only four inches taller than me and he’s very average in stature. She gets very stiff when he holds her, will run from him when he goes to pick her up (in fairness, sometimes she runs from me too, she just doesn’t like being picked up very much), and doesn’t approach him when he’s standing.

    I find this to be odd. He’s not imposing or anything. Maybe this is just an issue of time and exposure, but I’m probably going to have to go out of town for a while where he’s the only person handling her.

    We have him as the only person who feeds her, when he’s home he’s the one taking her out to potty, and we are definitely associating him with high value treats. He gives one when he’s gets home from work, any time she potties, and then just randomly.

    What else can we do to get her at the level of comfortability she has with me?

    submitted by /u/Forzara
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  • We’re at our breaking point — 4-month-old puppy constantly soiling crate despite everything

    My wife and I are at our breaking point. We got our puppy on September 22nd. She was born June 23rd, 2025, and is a mini Aussie/Chi mix, about 4.5 lbs now. From the start, it’s been rough. The place we got her from sold her to us with tapeworms and giardia. She spent her first 1–2 weeks with us isolated and having constant accidents during treatment. The parasites are gone now, but the potty problems never stopped. She poops or pees in her crate or playpen with zero warning—no crying, no pacing, no noise—and then stomps through it and licks it. We’ve caught it on camera more than once. She’s extremely anxious and fearful; our nanny cam shows her micro-pacing back and forth before or after she goes. Outside, she often doesn’t “go all the way.” She’ll poop a little, then minutes later go again, sometimes outside, sometimes inside right after coming back in. Other times she refuses to go at all, just lies in the grass eating leaves or grass, and then tries to poop or pee inside her crate or on the floor as soon as we come in. We’ve spent thousands on supplies, vet visits, and training attempts: Smallest crate possible (18 inches) for her 4.5 lb size Tried covered vs. uncovered crates, playpens, and short free-roam periods Enzymatic cleaners, dividers, bedding, puppy pads Strict feeding and potty schedule Multiple alarms every 1–3 hours overnight and motion-sensor cameras so we can take her out the moment she stirs Even on “good” days—just one or two accidents—it’s constant vigilance and little to no sleep. On bad days it’s five to ten accidents, multiple baths, and mess everywhere. She’ll go outside, but never consistently or completely, and it always feels like one step forward, three steps back. We probably should have returned her when we found out she was sick, but we didn’t want her ending up neglected. We’ve done everything we can think of, but it’s wearing us down. Has anyone dealt with a puppy like this—severe anxiety, no warning before accidents, incomplete bowel movements, constant crate soiling—and actually seen improvement? Is there something we’re missing, or is surrendering her at this point the only option? We have already had one local trainee tell us she will never be fully trained based on her behavior and refuse to take her.

    submitted by /u/AmbassadorPatient705
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  • Dog being person possessive-help

    My parent’s dog is quite possessive and it’s making me concerned about behavior escalating. My dog, Moz (7 year old lab mix) and I are temporarily living with my parents. My dog is well trained and relaxed, and is often by my side or close by. My parents’ dog, Cal (4 year old Bernese Mountain Miniature Poodle mix) is not trained and is very vocal aka barks incessantly. We’ve had problems in the past with Cal going after Moz for reasons we can’t understand. I’ve been bit twice by Cal when breaking it up-didn’t break the skin. Moz will just run and hide by me and doesn’t fight back. I don’t want him to become reactive so I’m on alert to keep Cal away. In the last month, Cal has stopped this but he has become more possessive of me. If I talk to Moz, Cal will growl/bark/get up from across the room to try and get between Moz and I. The same goes for when I’m petting Moz or when Moz has a toy. I’m at a loss for what to do and am concerned about the behavior. My parents’ think he just “loves me” but I know this is possession and not safe behavior.

    submitted by /u/Ivy-Moss
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  • board and train job?

    Hi, I currently have had 2 job interviews, one of which is for a small board and train facility, I would mostly be doing cleaning when each of the dogs are out of their kennel and also yard cleaning, and playing with dogs when/if necessary. I have 4 years of experience with dogs, ive been working at doggy daycare and boarding facilities, as well as briefly as a dog bather. I have the experience, im not worried about dogs at all, my only question is that I don’t really have the knowledge of train and board facilities. I have heard good and bad things about them. Is it ok if i take this job? I don’t like working at places that participate in unethical/abusive practices, my first animal job i had to leave because dogs were being neglected left and right due to high turnover rate. Under the impression that I get this job, do i go for it? I mean if anything, if i find that i don’t like the way that these people practice their profession I could always tap out in a few weeks/months, but im asking FIRST, do i do it, is it ok?

    submitted by /u/Aggravating-Tax-2675
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