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Hello all, first time post here and rather nervous. I’m reaching out because I’m really struggling and could use some support or perspective from people who’ve been through this.

For context, I got my 11-week-old Golden Retriever 10 days ago. The first week went relatively well, if exhausting — I had time off work and could focus on her. This week I’ve returned to work and things have felt like they’ve unravelled. I’m feeling constantly overwhelmed, anxious, tearful, and am having panic attacks during the day. I dread waking up in the morning and find it hard to relax even when she’s napping because I’m bracing for the next wake-up.

I work from home in a small apartment (4th floor). She has a pen and crate in the living room. She can settle for enforced naps, but only if I lie or sit directly in front of the crate. If I don’t, she barks loudly for 15+ minutes before eventually settling. I know some barking is normal, but mentally I’m really struggling to tolerate it, and I’ve lost confidence in distinguishing attention barking from genuine needs (toilet, water etc), which has added to my anxiety. This has made focused work almost impossible and is causing a lot of work-related guilt as well.

If I leave the room while she’s awake, she cries briefly and then stops — but only because she starts destroying her toilet setup (fake grass with puppy pad underneath) or the waterproof mat under the pen. She chews the plastic and fragments, which feels unsafe and adds another layer of stress.

I’ve read about puppy blues and thought I was prepared, but I’m shocked by how intense this feels. I’m finding myself becoming extremely frustrated and scared of losing my patience, which isn’t the person I want to be. I don’t know if what I’m experiencing is within the range of normal, if I’m handling things badly, or if this situation just isn’t compatible with my current capacity.

I’m not looking for judgement — I genuinely want to understand whether others have experienced this level of distress, and what helped them get through the working-from-home phase with a young puppy, or how they realised they needed more support or a different path.

Thank you for reading — even writing this has been hard.

My pup is about 3 months old, and we’ve had her for almost a month! I don’t expect perfection, I know she’s a baby and will have obstacles. We started crate training on the first day home and she’s been great about it, usually cries for a minute and settles, or just settles immediately.

Except for mornings. I get up for work around 6:30, and I try not to wake her earlier so she doesn’t adjust to that. This morning she woke me up howling around 5:40 but I assumed it was definitely just because she had to pee. I feed her, make sure she poops and pees, then put her away as I leave at 7:20. But, she howls the past couple days after being put away, and I have roommates. They’re mostly understanding but I want to avoid waking them up. Today I just left her in a mostly puppy-proofed room with the sleeping boyfriend and older dog because I had to leave, but it would keep me sane knowing she’s safe in a crate.

Does anyone have any tips?

i have an 11 week old dachshund and he just wont stop crying! he has everything, every toy, every chew, every comfort. i know thats what pups do but im just worried im missing something. whenever i leave the room, he cries, when i put him in his crate and leave him, even though he loves it, he cries deathly screams. is it because ive gone to him when he doesnt settle? because he could scream for hours and i dont want to create a bad relationship with his crate! just need a bit of advice or reassurance.

I have a 10 week old puppy, a girl, we are trying to crate train for when she has to be home alone (which hasn’t even happened yet, and wont happen regularly at all lol) but she just cannot be left in her crate without crying. Ive seen countless things about just rewarding them when they're quiet, but she’s never quiet. she just screams. ESPECIALLY when it’s covered.

I just don’t really know what to do, she’s not progressing.

I have an adorable 17 week old golden retriever puppy. After the first few nights we got her, she’s done great in her crate. She would settle right down and a few weeks ago, she was staying in there for a few hours napping, would wake up and play a little, and put herself back to sleep.

The last few days out of nowhere she hates her crate and barks uncontrollably. I’ve tried taking her out and holding her, obviously making sure she doesn’t need to go to the bathroom, we’ve been giving her meals in there again for the last week or so, and nothing is working. Ultimately I will give her a lick mat and she will do that and go to sleep.

Her biting has also gotten worse, she has torn up my winter coat from latching onto it while she’s on her leash and pulling. It starts about 15 minutes after she’s been awake.

We’re going to get in trouble with our apartment for all of this barking. Does anyone know what I’m doing wrong? Thanks in advance for any suggestions 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

This is for identification purposes only. His leash will be attached to a harness. I’d just like something that doesn’t come on and off to attach an ID tag on. Is collapsing trachea caused by the pulling on a collar or just having a collar?

Dog is a 9 month old "Double doodle" (50% poodle, 25% labrador 25% golden retriever) and is absolutely fine with her crate. She will sleep through the night no problem and just saying "Name – Crate" in a nice tone once and she'll bound in there and lay down.

We're at the point now where she is only having 1 real enforced "crate nap" for 2-3 hours a day during the day as we're trying to teach her to self-settle and sleep outside the crate during the day. She's slowly getting better at this but still sleeps much better in her crate as she's seemingly a very light sleeper and will wake up if I even try to go to the bathroom if she's asleep in the room.

She will never choose to go sleep in her crate on her own though as she likes being with us (doesn't have separation anxiety but she is quite a shy dog in general demeanour)

She never whines and complains about going into the crate so I think she likes it just fine, but as she is fine with it should we ever deviate from this? Or just have her sleep & nap only in her crate forever more if she's fine with it and no good elsewhere?

I've seen some people suggest Putting them in the crate with the door open, but when in the crate she sleeps with a cover over it so this isn't really possible

I really don't want to have to crate her to sleep her whole life if I can avoid it. As I say she seems completely fine with it and 0 whining / sadness using it but it feels odd to have to put them in a cage to sleep their whole life. Is this the norm and I'm just overthinking it?

Looking for some advice regarding regression on toilet training for my 4 month Border Collie puppy.

When i first got her, she came from a licensed breeder from a farm (an actual farm, not a puppy farm just for clarification). So i knew she had never been in a house and toilet training would take time.

First two weeks there were a lot of accidents. Next two weeks were much better and accidents were significantly down and often could be attributed to my mistakes and bad timing. She did her business in the garden but would rarely do anything on a walk (Expected as she is excited and focusing on all the new smells)

However this last week she has seemed to regress. She still pees outside but poos inside. No matter what i do or how often she is walked out let out into the garden, she poos inside (Luckily often in the bathroom but still not great)

She will be out in the garden, pee have a smell then walk straight back in the house and poo.

I'm not sure how this has happened. I'm going back a few steps to get her back to pooing outside but I'm concerned as what has caused this and if it's something I've done or can avoid doing in future.

Any help would be appreciated

Hey! My kaninchen teckel is around 2 year old now and she is too attached to my family. The people who are the most home is she the most attached with and everytime they leave or one of them leaves she is crying and sad and watching out the windows the whole time.

Everytime we go away for more then 1 hour we will take her with us so that isn't it.

If my family goes into the car and we go somewhere and we stop for a min to refuel the car she would be crying and making sounds while 4 out of 5 people are still in the car and the person who is refueling the car is standing outside next to the car.

Any tips?

My dog has always been stubborn, but I just realized she’s basically a full-time genius in disguise. I could call her, wave toys, even crouch like I’m ready to play… and she’d just stare at me like I was speaking a foreign language.

Then, as soon as I open a bag of her favorite snacks, she transforms into the most obedient, happy pup ever. Sit? Instantly. Come? Zooms over. Roll over? She gives this smug look like, ‘Finally, you speak my language.’

I feel like I’ve been outsmarted for years and only now caught on. Anyone else have a dog who suddenly turns into a little angel for snacks, but ignores you like a boss the rest of the time? Would love to hear your stories of clever, food-motivated pups!