Stupid Puppy Blues – need to vent ?

Hello everyone,

I don't really know why I'm posting, maybe I want to have something to go back to when I'll feel better. maybe I'm seeking advice, reassurance…

with my husband we adopted a White shepherd ("berger blanc suisse" in french) 10 weeks old, 16 days ago, and since day 6 I'm having a hard case of puppy blues.

We were prepared (or so I thought), I read a lot and we are living in a house so this is relatively easy to manage potty training.

He is "easy" : he already figured out our rhythm, is not really too energetic, and when he goes troll mode he can go down in 10-15', he figured where he can pee/poo outside the house, he let us sleep for 6h straight, etc.

I was alone during the day the 5 first days as my husband couldn't take 2 weeks of vacation. And I think it has really tired me to be alone in the beginning.

we got back to work Tuesday, He is alone 3-4h in the morning then he goes to our good friends house who work from home Tuesday Thursday and Friday when we work all day.

Everything on paper seems good, there is some accident but nothing crazy, this evening he was more excited than usual but nothing impossible. But i lost my patience so fast, luckily my husband was here to help.

But I'm lost/so depressed, I think that I'm lacking sleep but today it feels like I took the worst decision of my life. I feel like i will feel trap forever and with our work schedule he will be sad forever (even if we can put him at my friend house and i can walk him nearly 1h in morning and i'm at home at 5:30pm).

the worst part is that I feel that even if he is "easy" he will go berserk at any moment. and I can't shake this feeling off.

i feel stupid, and I try to not listen to all of my anxious thought but it's difficult and I feel like I'm a burden to my husband. who is really supportive but he has a stressful job and I don't want to be a burden.

I feel that there is some progress but that's up and down and I want that feeling to fade.

I don't want to return him because he is already attached and a really good puppy but sometimes I wish that he could disappear for 1 hour or 2 so I can get back to my old life. and I hate to think that.

I have an appointment with my therapist on Monday (breaking a 1.5 year without appointment yeaaah) I hope it will help.

I dont' know what I'm searching here… maybe some input ? or a way to letting it out ?

sorry English is not my first language, have a beautiful day/night everyone .