Anyone have a puppy and a toddler?

I haven’t had a puppy since I was in grade 4.

Now I’m a mom with a husband, toddler and a cat. I’m not sure why I expected this little 12 week old puppy to be calmer. I was told he was such a calm and sweet pup. So I wasn’t expecting velociraptor pup so soon. I’m home during the day and my toddler is in daycare – I thought potty training would go pretty smooth as long as I stayed vigilant on taking him out every 1/2hr.

Nope. He will sniff around outside and go potty maybe 40% of the time outside (I reward profusely) but I’m vigilant on watching him and still he sneaks off and goes inside when I let my guard down for even a millisecond. I’m terrified of bad habits forming so I get super stressed.

Then my son comes home from daycare and it’s just mayhem. Puppy nips at him and toddler runs away crying which causes chasing as im running after them yelling and losing my cool. I’m trying to teach toddler to stand his ground and teach the puppy “leave it” (which is actually going okay – but when he really wants something he won’t listen to the command) and then the puppy poops on the floor even though I’ve just had him out for 20 minutes after I fed him, trying to get into a routine with meals – it’s all just chaos from 5-8pm

Oh. I also have a cat that’s 1/2 outdoor and if the cat is outside when the puppy is, he’ll zoom back and forth taunting the puppy so the puppy won’t go. So I have to try and single handed throw the cat inside without my toddler opening the door to let him back out.

When does it get easier? I’m trying my hardest to just relax and not stress over every accident and be the calm in the chaos. Puppy really is extremely cute, it was meant to be in a way, and rehoming isn’t happening. I just gotta deal better I guess. I’m really, extremely overstimulated and stressed though. My husband did say the timing wasn’t great but I wanted the puppy lol. Now I feel awful for feeling how I feel when I wanted this. I had visions of us going on daily walks together, the park, I just envisioned it being a bit easier. It feels like 20% all too much right now. I haven’t cried but I’ve been close.

I wish I had a remote like in “click” just to fast forward this part lol.