First, let me give some back story.
I have a four year old toy poodle. He is mg absolute WORLD. He’s my SOUL DOG. My husband and I are those people who call him our son, he goes everywhere with us when he can, and we absolutely love him. He follows me everywhere and we’re both very attached to each other. I can travel without him, but I get sad on trips we do that he can’t go with us. He also has AAI (Atlanto axial instability) and wears a neck brace. At 10 months old is when we found out about the AAI because he fell over while playing and stopped breathing. He lost his ability to walk or stand on his own. I worked from home and did physical therapy with him and gave him 24 hour care as he had to learn to walk and potty outside by himself all over again. Once I started working in office again, he started suffering from isolation distress. When he gets stressed, he struggles to control his bowel movements. When he’d go in his kennel, he’d poop and smash into it and we’d come home to him COVERED. At the time we lived next door to my in laws, so my MIL would watch him for us. If we all leave the house, he does fine home alone with their two dogs.
Within the past year, we’ve moved but are still relatively close. I really don’t love having to drop off our poodle every time I leave the house or having my MIL pick him up at some point during the day. I’d love for him to just be home and be okay. We’ve tried leaving him home free roaming, sectioning off part of the house for him but he’s destroyed the garage door frame just from scratching at it (not biting or chewing anything). Lately he’s been back in the kennel and not pooping in there but is anxious the entire time. Recently, we caught him sticking his head through the openings at the top of his crate as we were leaving the house which is incredibly dangerous regardless of his AAI but with that it’s an absolute NO. As soon as we saw that I said “that’s it, we’re getting another dog”. I’ve been talking about getting a second dog for a while because the poodle does great when left home and free roaming with my in laws dogs or even my parents dogs if we’re there. It has been a casual conversation between my husband and I, but we haven’t seriously sat down and talked about it.
Now, here’s where I’m feeling conflicted. Christmas morning I opened a box with an 11 week old puppy inside. He had been staying at my in laws house until Christmas, so my poodle was already familiar with him. Of course I was instantly happy and he’s SO CUTE, but as the day went on I felt more and more uneasy about it. How will my poodle feel? How can I give both of them enough love and attention? Is this really the right move for our family? What risk does this pose to my poodles AAI? Will this really help the isolation distress? It’s been a week now obviously, and I am growing to love the little guy more, but these questions are still weighing heavy on me and I am starting to unintentionally make my husband feel bad about his decision. I know his intentions were good, and I know this wasn’t the best thing he could have done so I don’t want any opinions giving on his decision making. I know this was an act of love and him making a decision on what he felt was a good idea for our family. Whenever my poodle growls at him for trying to play or stealing his toys, I just feel defensive for him and then instantly feel guilty feeling that way towards the puppy. I am slowly growing attached, but I’m also not sure if he is attaching to me or my husband. I know this was my idea and something I wanted and recently said was going to happen. I’m just questioning my decision and also grieving us being a family of three. I never thought I’d struggle with having room in my heart for more dogs as I am very much a dog person and grew up in a multi dog home.
I know it’s been a week and he’s bounced around a bit, but I just have all these questions and uneasiness. Does anyone else have a similar experience? Or any advice or comforting words? Thanks in advance!
Also wanted to add, my MIL loves him and has said if for some reason it doesn’t work out, she’s happy to keep him, but even that makes me feel horribly guilty. As much as I grieve our family of three, it hurts thinking of him not working out.
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