TL;DR: I’ve always had a greyhound, including when my partner and I met. I now feel ready to adopt again. I’ve even found the perfect rescue greyhound. My partner suddenly doesn’t want a dog and can’t explain why beyond vague reasons, even though I did all the care previously. I’m lonely at home and miss having a dog deeply. If I adopt, he may resent it; if I don’t, I’m giving up something core to who I am for no clear reason. Not sure what to do.
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My partner and I have been together for 3 years and live together. When we met and for most of our relationship, I already had my own greyhound — he was my absolute soul dog. I now feel ready to open my heart again.
I’m incredibly passionate about rescuing ex-racing greyhounds here in Australia. There is such a huge need, and anyone who has ever loved a greyhound knows how gentle, cuddly, goofy, and sensitive they are. I work from home two days a week, I’m home every weekend, and it’s honestly lonely and quiet without a dog. My partner works six days a week out of home, so he’s barely here during the day.
With my soul dog, I took care of almost everything — walks, feeding, medication, cuddles, the lot. My partner would help sometimes, but as most greyhound owners know, they’re incredibly low-maintenance dogs. And it was never an issue. He loved my dog too.
Recently, after looking at reputable greyhound rescues, I found a dog that feels like the perfect match — 4 years old, low-energy, no injuries or anxiety, an absolute sweetheart. One short walk a day is all he needs. We went to meet him, and honestly, we both really liked him.
For context, my partner is otherwise incredibly loving, caring, supportive, and level-headed. We have a very strong relationship, communicate well, and he’s usually very fair and reasonable. That’s part of why this is throwing me — this reaction feels out of character for him. He isn’t someone who makes decisions from emotion or fear, and he’s not usually rigid about things. But now… he has suddenly put his foot down.
He keeps saying it’s “not the right time,” “too soon,” “the dog is too big,” etc. But none of these reasons truly make sense, because a greyhound was already part of my life when we met and for most of our relationship (we live together now). Nothing about the lifestyle or dog size is new. And he can’t actually articulate what’s different now — just that he isn’t keen and it’s too soon.
He says I can make whatever decision I want, but that feels like a trap — if I go ahead, I risk resentment. If I don’t, I’m the only one sitting alone in a quiet house, missing something that has always been a huge part of who I am.
It feels unfair that he can just say no without a clear, rational reason, especially when this was part of my life from the beginning. I’m trying to respect him, but I also feel like I’m shrinking myself down to keep the peace.
So I don’t know what to do. Adopt the dog at the risk of resentment? Or give up something deeply important to me without any real explanation?
Edit: he has said maybe next year we will be “ready” and it’ll be a better time. But won’t explain why need to wait. For me, if we will adopt one anyway, why not just now when we found the perfect one? I know there could be more suitable dogs in the future, but it makes no sense why we have to wait. He did love my previous greyhound but not in the way I did.
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