I have no idea what to do…

Hi guys… so I’m 22 and live in a 2 bedroom apartment on my own. I suffer with both physical and mental disabilities which I know might make you think how can I take care of a dog…

I knew going into this is was going to be hard, I’ve had a dog/puppy before but I was A LOT younger then with family who all looked after him. No one could have prepared me for how hard this would be.

I now have a 9 week old golden retriever puppy and he is the most handsome, amazing boy I have ever seen. I’ve had him 6 days and I love him so much I feel like my heart could explode so why am I crying all day everyday…

My family were very supportive of me getting this dog, the idea was that he would come to me as a puppy so we could bond and that he would be raised as a service dog. This dog is so so amazing, in 6 days he knows his name, sit, paw and he does really well in his crate.

He does 90% of wees on pads and maybe idk 30% of poos on pads which obviously I would prefer outside training but he isn’t fully vaccinated and I have no private garden.

Today I felt so broken and distraught, he started off the day by catching me while he thought he was playing but reality is he was biting and even after trying to tell him no he went on. He has been chewing on everything… my couch, clothes, computer chair, metal but I’m most concerned about him chewing my doors, walls and radiator… I had to pull parts of wood from the door and part of the wall out of his mouth today which could have been really harmful to him.

In the past 6 days it’s taken a massive toll on my mental health and physical, my back is in so much pain I don’t even feel like I should move half the time (it’s normally not that bad).

I even got so defeated that I texted the breeder I got him from to check how long the cooling off period is (I have till next Friday till it ends).

I really don’t know what to do here, I love him to the ends of the earth, more than anything and other than the chewing and biting he is the perfect puppy and it’s obvious that he loves me, he has really rapidly bonded which makes this decision all the more harder for me.

I don’t want to take him back, it’ll break my heart he is everything I’ve wanted (except the biting and destroying my home) but is this what’s best for him? I don’t want to fail and if I give him back I’ll truly hate it and maybe myself for it and I don’t want to hurt him either, I don’t want him to feel abandoned… What do I do? :((